Prophecy

Years after the axe comes down, my prophecy fufilled, your self realized, you will see me on the stage, in that display you claim to hate, of course you never appreciated what it was that i wanted to be appreciated for, never speaking in absolutes, nevertheless starved for sex appeal slowly eating myself from the inside out, highest mortality rate, killing myself in the delusion that if i were only slightly more appealing then all would be settled and you would love me eternally, because no matter how deep i dive i can never shake the feeling that this is all just so shallow, we are all just so shallow, venturing into the grown up pool, three feet deep, discussing how scary IT WOULD BE if your feet didnt touch the bottom, and im not going to lie, ill say i swim in the deep end, but i only swim beneath the bulkheads in mock suicides, scaring only the lifeguards, meth life, stay awake, not for the high, for the paranoia, i know you love it so, i know you love those mascara boys so, i know you love it all so, and you just deny deny deny deny, like we all do, cause we all lie, we all have those faces we never show, and those masks, closet kept, we love to know that they are there for us, for when we need to lie, love, hook up, cry, comfort, die, or just risk it one more time in some hallucinogen existential meltdown, battered wife, two black eyes, and your drunk again, telling me dont make me tell you again, cause i wont listen, because i cant hear you through the slurs, counting down the nights as i say i wont take one more.