Monday, August 14, 2006


I feel more alone right now than i think i ever have before

I am both literally and figurativly a junkie without dope

I'm just tired, so goddamn tired.

Sunday, August 06, 2006

A return..

Its been a long fucking time since i posted in here, so i doubt anyone still checks it anymore

Probably for the better because im getting more and more insecure about my writing, which is why i have done so little of it in the past few months.

The past few months have had a strange conversion in me, id like to blame everyone else, but i know that its all me. And its all probably due to my return to drug usage, even though i know that im not using nearly as heavily as before it still bothers me, it still changes something inside of me.

I now wear a shell
I stay on my back, rocking
It disables me

Back to the old school cyrptic shit for me

last night i counted the bridges ive burned
never meaning to do so
but leaving a trail of gasoline behind you
will always produce such events

Burned bridges is the perfect symbol for the situation at hand, because with work, an patience you can rebuild bridges and get back, but its never the same as before. So in my mind, its better just to count my losses and move on

(Lame pop culture refereces approaching)

I hold back alot of what i feel, and want to say, because it is associated with a current trend, but i decided this morning (hence the opening up in a new blog) to fuck them. Im a writer, ive been a writer since as long as i can remeber. And just because at one point in my life communations of the word became illict doesnt mean i should hold back, or stop.

Sinned against my craft
Sinned against my old friends
What wonderful fuel